Living with someone that has a gambling addiction can be a nightmare. Their compulsive gambling may ruin your finances, cost you your home, or even your children. However, learning to cope and live with an addict can be difficult. On the one hand, you know that they have a problem with gambling. On the other hand, you love them and do not want to hurt their feelings or cause them to walk out.
If you have a loved one that has a gambling problem, one of the first things that you should do is to let the gambler in your family deal with the problems brought about by the gambling on his own. In other words, do not be an enabler. If you see that the gambler has debts that are rising, resist the urge to give him money. It may be difficult, but doing so is important. The sooner than the gambler recognizes that he has problems, the sooner he can get help. If you loan money, you are only putting off the inevitable and hurting yourself financially in the process. Also, never lie or cover up for the gambler, since this can have the same effect of postponing the gambler’s realization that there is a problem.
Next, think about staging an intervention with close family members and friends. In an intervention, you and other people that are close to the gambler will confront the gambler in a non-hostile manner about his addiction. Your goal is to explain to the gambler about how his gambling addiction is affecting your life and how you really feel about the situation. More often than not, people with gambling problems are very self centered and do not realize the damage that their addiction is causing. Their addiction may be so bad that they have withdrawn completely from normal family life, making them oblivious to how their addiction is impacting the other people in the house. By staging an intervention and verbalizing the problems that the gambling addiction has caused, some gamblers may realize that they do have a problem and may be willing to get help for their addiction.
It’s important that when you confront your loved one about his addiction that you not be too combative. Doing so can actually cause them to withdraw more and fuel their addiction since it can make them feel better about things. Try to be understanding and supportive, letting them know that you are there to help them and that you only want to do what is best for them.
You can also take steps to keep your loved one from gambling such as setting up filters on the computer and refusing to go to physical casinos. In some places, it is also possible for an individual to register with casino security to ban themselves from the premises.
Finally, take steps to take care of yourself financially. Open a second bank account in your name only and start setting money aside. You may also want to change your credit card billing information into your name. In addition, you could also design a plan where you give the person with the gambling addiction a cash allowance, which will help to minimize his gambling resources.